Proverbs 18:24

A recent journal entry...

22 July 2013

It's 8:43 at night as I sit down and write this. I wasn't planning on writing tonight but it just kind of hit me. It's the night before I move. It's the closing of one incredible chapter of my life and tomorrow starts a new one. I've spent the last two days packing. It's hard to see the entirety of my first year on my own packed away into roughly twenty boxes. This whole process is kind of scary. Just under a year ago I moved out of my family's home in Huntsville and came to school here in Tuscaloosa. Around this time last year I still didn't have a place to live and I was frantically searching Tuscaloosa for a place to say that I could afford. There was even talk of me moving under the stairs at my friend's house. How Harry Potter is that? That would have been an adventure for sure! Luckily, though, I stumbled across a small efficiency apartment with a bathroom, thankfully, but without a kitchen. I signed my lease and started making plans to move. My entire apartment is roughly the size of my bedroom back home. It's not much but it has been home for the past year. I was so excited to get down here, but when it actually happened I didn't know what to do next. The day I moved, my family and I went to dinner at Jimmy Johns. After that they were gone and I was unsure of what to do next, so I just laid on my bed and stared at my ceiling. That's when I got a call from one of my best friends to come hang out. It was trivia night at Wilhagan's. I needed something fun to take my mind off of the overwhelming day that had just occurred, so this was perfect. He didn't know what he was doing when he invited me to hang out, but that was one of the best nights I've had.

Over the next few months I slowly became acclimated to life on my own, and life in general at the University. I have made some of the greatest friends in just the past year. I have seen so much growth in these people over this year. It amazes me and makes me proud to call them all my friends. Also, if I can brag on myself for a moment, I think I've become a slightly more outgoing person, but it's not what I've done. These people have challenged me, and I'm so thankful for them. There have been hard times, late nights studying, and a few mistakes and hurtful words said. But, without mistakes, we don't grow. I'm so thankful for my friends, new and old.

This year also found me in the middle of such a strong core group of believers. It was hard for me to find a church to call home this year. I'm so used to the family I have back in Huntsville that I felt I was betraying them by moving. It wasn't without much guiding and mentoring that I finally was able to plant myself permanently in one place, and what a blessing that has been. The friends and family I have gained has made such an impact on my life. I'm incredibly thankful that God has put such a place in my path.

However, this year was not without it's struggles. It was extremely difficult for me to be by myself this year, both financially and emotionally. Praise God I was able to find jobs to support myself with. And with such amazing friends, I was able to get through this year. So it was very difficult for me when so many of them left. Some, for just the summer to go back home, and some, gone for good, finding jobs and moving away. Saying goodbye has never been easy for me, not that it's easy for anyone. but I know that my friends are doing fine. It's so great to see and hear them doing great things.

So, in the last night I'll be spending in this apartment, a few topics have come to mind, along with a few passages that relate:

One of the struggles of this year was finding housing for next year. Housing that I could afford with friends that I need. That was a struggle that set me on edge for quite a while. Every option I had that seemed to be perfect kept closing and nothing seemed to be working. But then, as always, God showed me that his plan was better and he was providing. I was asked to serve on the Apartment Ministry Team as a missionary. Bam! My housing was decided. I was then paired up with a great friend of mine. Boom! Another need met. I worried so much, and for nothing! God had it figured out the whole time. So with that, Matthew 6:25-34 was constantly playing in my head. Don't be anxious. God will proved what you need. He allowed me this year on my own to grow me, yet he gave me everything I needed. Let me emphasize that: NEEDED. Believe me, there was plenty that I wanted to do, and some of it I did, but all that I needed was provided. God has been amazingly faithful with what he was provided to me.

Beyond providing me with living, God placed amazing support in my life this year. Excellent quality time spent overlooking neighborhoods atop balconies, enjoying the weather, time away camping, or even stargazing on burial mounds. There was plenty of time spent worshiping through the word and song. God had provided love and friendship in times that I thought I didn't need anyone. 1 John 4:19 says, "We love because he first loved us." and in John 13:35, Jesus says, "By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." These have stuck out to me all year, but beyond those, there is one that has deeply resonated this year. Proverbs 18:24 "A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." I have been so blessed to grow in brotherhood with those that I've met.

So as I sit here among my boxes, I pray that I take to heart what I've learned this year. I pray that I trust God in all things, and I thank God for the friends and family I've been given. I know that they will support me, and guide me with His love and I pray that I use it to spread His name through my apartment and through my campus. I am beyond blessed. I'm not sure I would end this chapter in any other way. Bless God!

Hypocrite, liar, failure. Saved by grace.

-Caleb